Man finds cure to illness on completely legitimate website

Man finds cure to illness on completely legitimate website

Convinced that he’d finally found the cure for his long-term illness, local resident Lee Williams thanked the website “Totally Real Medicine” for his new chance at life. “It was absolutely amazing,” said Williams, who, despite suffering from his sickness for the last several years, has yet to see a doctor. “All my symptoms were there. […]

Education Secretary Betsy DaVos to reportedly add Flying Spaghetti Monster to school curriculum

Education Secretary Betsy DaVos to reportedly add Flying Spaghetti Monster to school curriculum

WASHINGTON, DC – Billionaire Betsy DaVos, home-school and anti-science expert, will be the Education Secretary tapped with leading America’s education into the future. One small hiccup for some is that she is not very fond of education. “I believe home schooling and religious schooling is the best choice for children, especially children of billionaires,” explained […]

World Health Organization classifies Monsanto’s dihydrogen monoxide as “probably carcinogenic”

World Health Organization classifies Monsanto’s dihydrogen monoxide as “probably carcinogenic”

SWITZERLAND – The World Health Organization struck a huge blow against Monsanto today when they classified one of their most used chemicals, dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO), as “probably carcinogenic.” “Monsanto uses this chemical in almost everything they make and studies show that if humans consume too much of it, they will die,” said WHO spokesman Kevin […]

Guest Post: Will driverless cars change our lives for the better?

Guest Post: Will driverless cars change our lives for the better?

Driverless cars are all the rage: Tesla’s autopilot is the perfect way to get through that mindless traffic during your commute, and Google has started a brand new company to handle all of their self-driving car technologies. Even Uber has gotten into the game with self-driving cars in Pittsburgh and San Francisco. Is this new […]

Trump to meet with flat earthers to discuss Planetary Safety Committee

Trump to meet with flat earthers to discuss Planetary Safety Committee

NEW YORK, NY – President-elect Donald Trump announced today that he will be meeting with top ranking flat earth conspiracy theorists to form a Planetary Safety Committee. It was recently announced that Trump is considering appointing anti-vaccine conspiracy nut Robert Kennedy Jr. to form a vaccine safety committee which has left normal, rational people scratching […]