PHOENIX, AZ – A fire hydrant in a suburb of Phoenix, Arizona burst last night, causing water to come spraying out all over the street. Children ran in excitement and began playing in the water, trying to cool off from the 90 degree weather. However, the children were not the only ones to rush to […]
Much to the consternation of younger members of the anti-vaccine movement, Sean Segal, a prominent 80 year-old founder of the modern anti-vaccine movement keeps claiming that the mercury in thiomersal causes autism. Thiomersal was removed from all childhood vaccines over a decade ago, prompting anti-vaccine advocates to shift the blame to other vaccine ingredients. “Look, […]
Local mother Nancy Del Grande recently stumbled upon a website showing all the possible causes of death in the United States. After some quick math showed her that dying in a car accident or choking to death on food are much more likely that a serious vaccine reaction, she made the difficult choice to not […]
GENEVA – The World Health Organization (WHO) has officially classified David “Avocado” Wolfe as ‘probably carcinogenic’. Wolfe joins the growing list which recently added red meat and being a hairdresser to the long list of chemicals, foods and jobs.
OREGON – Epidemiologists and doctors are baffled as to why the outbreak of dysentery continues to spread across all parts of the Oregon Trail despite their best efforts. “We have seen thousands of cases with no clear indication that the trend will slow down,” said epidemiologist Dr. Rick Haudas. Dysentery is an infection of the […]
Here are 6 quick and easy chemical names for everyday substances. Try to slip them into your conversations at work and impress your co-workers! This was a tactic originally devised by the anti-vaccine cult to make people believe they knew stuff about science. Water – DiHydrogen Monoxide Salt – Sodium Chloride Aspirin – Acetylsalicylic […]