Report: High levels of dihydrogen monoxide found in homeopathic products

Report: High levels of dihydrogen monoxide found in homeopathic products

In a recent report released by science, all homeopathic products which were tested found high levels of dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO), a colorless, odorless chemical which can be fatal to humans. “We tested several different products, some of which are even marketed to children, and we found significant levels of DHMO in all of them,” a […]

Anti-vaccine mom blames vaccines after son sprains ankle playing soccer

Anti-vaccine mom blames vaccines after son sprains ankle playing soccer

CHICAGO, IL – Mary Saunders, 32 year-old mother of Sean Saunders, had her son vaccinated before she had an internet connection and learned the true dangers of vaccines. This past weekend Sean was playing soccer with his little tikes team The Dragons, when Sean stepped on the ball and rolled his ankle. A mother of […]

Alternative Homeopathy is the newest craze among physicians

Alternative Homeopathy is the newest craze among physicians

NEW YORK, NY – The medical world is abuzz with its latest trend: Alternative Homeopathy. “Basically Alternative Homeopathy is the opposite of traditional homeopathy in that it contains active ingredients,” explained Dr. Andrew Garland. “We found that by having actual ingredients in medicines really made them much more effective.” While homeopathy traditionally relies on something […]

6 top selling homeopathic treatments and what they can do for you

6 top selling homeopathic treatments and what they can do for you

Are you thinking about wasting some money? Feeling sick and don’t really wanna get better? Here is a list of some of the best selling homeopathic remedies on the market today and what they can do for you: Arnica (mountain daisy): Doesn’t do fuck all. Sinusalia (sinus pain): Doesn’t do fuck all. Magnesia phosphorica (phosphate […]

Education Secretary Betsy DaVos to reportedly add Flying Spaghetti Monster to school curriculum

Education Secretary Betsy DaVos to reportedly add Flying Spaghetti Monster to school curriculum

WASHINGTON, DC – Billionaire Betsy DaVos, home-school and anti-science expert, will be the Education Secretary tapped with leading America’s education into the future. One small hiccup for some is that she is not very fond of education. “I believe home schooling and religious schooling is the best choice for children, especially children of billionaires,” explained […]

World Health Organization classifies Monsanto’s dihydrogen monoxide as “probably carcinogenic”

World Health Organization classifies Monsanto’s dihydrogen monoxide as “probably carcinogenic”

SWITZERLAND – The World Health Organization struck a huge blow against Monsanto today when they classified one of their most used chemicals, dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO), as “probably carcinogenic.” “Monsanto uses this chemical in almost everything they make and studies show that if humans consume too much of it, they will die,” said WHO spokesman Kevin […]

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