Porter pushes same empty hospital bed for entire 12 hour shift


SEATTLE, WA – Matt Harper, a porter at Mercy West Hospital in Seattle, Washington spent his entire 12-hour shift pushing around the same empty hospital bed. No one seemed to notice, as they all assumed Harper was on his way to pick up a patient.

“The key is to look stressed and always in a rush” said Harper. “People just assume you are on your way to pick up an emergency patient.”

Harpers co-workers are oblivious to his tactics, stating that Harper is one of the hardest working porters in the hospital. “Matt is always on the go, rushing around the hospital. He is a very valuable asset for us,” said Harper’s boss, Bob Sakemano.

“I don’t think I’ve picked up an actual patient in about two weeks,” laughed Harper.

Harper can be seen on all floors and units in the hospital walking briskly to and from the elevators, often perspiring and out of breath.

“We love Matt up here,” said charge nurse Helen Jennings. “He works so hard and is always in a good mood.”

At press time, Harper was due for his performance review and is expecting a very substantial raise.


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