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New law makes it legal for atheist doctors and nurses to refuse care to religious patients

in News by
science, health, satire, vaccines.

JACKSON, MS – A new law in Mississippi has made it legal for doctors and nurses to refuse care to certain patients on religious grounds . The law allows medical staff to refuse treatment to members of the LGBQT community on the grounds that it violates…

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"The flu shot turned my son straight!" claims grieving mother

in News by

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Elaine Smith is beside herself with grief after she believes that this years annual flu vaccine changed her son from a normal homosexual young man into a sexually perverse heterosexual. “Jamie was always a fun, energetic and very caring young man,”…

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Area mother claims "the flu shot turned my son gay!"

in News by

Local mother Anne Fitzpatrick is devastated that her beloved son, Austin, was turned “into a gay” by this years influenza vaccine. While some are doubting her story, she says he is a completely different person after the shot. “Before he got his flu shot he…

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Scientists discover new Homo species: Homo Phobius

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Scientists from The Smithsonian Institution announced today news of the discovery of a new species of Homo, the Homo Phobius. The Homo Phobius is said to roam parts of the southern United States and several middle eastern countries, most notably Iran. “This is a huge…

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Report: Getting divorced 3 times still better for sanctity of marriage than gay marriage

in Conspiracy by

ROWAN COUNTY, KY – In a report released today by The Department of Religion and Bigotry, the authors describe how being divorced multiple times is still preferable for the sanctity of marriage than allowing two men or women to marry. “Gay marriage is ruining America.…

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Gay minister refuses to marry straight couple

in Conspiracy by

AUSTIN, TX – Minister Robbie Tobin of Austin, Texas has found himself in hot water with the conservative right after word got out that he refused to marry a straight couple out of a deep personal belief. The law now states that officiants cannot refuse…

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