The CDC has announced that numerous samples of viruses, bacteria, and other pathogens have been discovered in forgotten corners of labs across the country. Forty-four labs were inspected in the last 6 months, with 3 of them yielding discoveries of dangerous pathogen samples.
“What we found was very disturbing” says Dr. Steve Riccardo of the CDC. “We found a sample of Ricin, Ebola and one labeled ‘Gary’s fart’. Ebola and Ricin we know how to handle, but this last one kind of has us scratching our heads.”
The mysterious Gary is presumed to be Gary Buchanan, a 24 year-old lab tech who worked at the lab for only 6 months in the early 1990’s. He was fired for inappropriate conduct. Officials say they are weary of opening the jar and are not sure what happens to a human fart when locked in an airtight canister for over 20 years.
“As far as we can ascertain, this is first such sample that has ever been persevered so well for so long,” explains Dr. Riccardo.
The CDC is treating the sample as a level 4 biohazard and is transporting the sample back to Atlanta for analysis.
Gary could not be reached for comment.