A groundbreaking study released by the FCA (Facebook Commenter Association) showed that over 90% of the world’s problems can be traced back to just two sources: President Barack Obama and Monsanto Company.
“To be honest, we aren’t really surprised” said principal investigator Allan Trolling. “We had a suspicion that these would be the two main culprits. This study just proves that.”
It was pointed out to the group that having a conclusion before beginning a trial or study would introduce bias, but the researchers dismissed the idea, saying “the data shows what the data shows.” This is a common tactic used by many pseudoscience and anti-vaccine zealots: set up a study or trial with the goal of confirming vaccines are bad, homeopathy works, acupuncture is more than placebo, etc. Confirmation bias abounds.
Neither Monsanto nor the White House returned The Spudd’s requests for an interview.
In the meantime, the study can at least give people solace in knowing that if something doesn’t go right in their life, there is a very good chance it wasn’t their fault.