Scientists worried local dad may never learn correct lyrics to popular songs

Local dad Jeff Shields, 51, has always loved to sing – especially the newest top 40 hits. The problem is he rarely knows the actual words.

“I always hear him around the house singing the right tune, sort of, but the words are always messed up” said wife Rebecca. “I mean, he sings the same damn songs all the time you think he would know the words by now.”

Family members have also reported that Shields has been told the correct lyrics numerous times, but is seemingly unable to remember them.

“The other day he was singing some Taylor Swift songs and kept saying “Take it off, take it off”. It’s so annoying,” said daughter Jess, 22. “He even messes up the older songs too, the ones I know he has heard a hundred times.”

The Shields family recalls the time when Jeff was singing the Black Crowes song Hard to Handle every day for weeks on end and continuously sangĀ “Hey little thing let me light your candle cuz mama I’m so hard to mess around, get around.” [The correct lyrics are ‘Hey little thing let me light your candle cuz mama I’m sureĀ hard to handle now, yes I am.]

Scientists report that many dads throughout the world suffer from the same problem and there is no hope on the horizon.

“We have heard of several reports of dads being unable or unwilling to learn the correct lyrics to songs,” said Dr. Neil Stephens. “We unfortunately don’t see any real hope in the future either.”

For now, scientists advise family members to simply remind dads of the correct lyrics and hope for best. Other wise, just go with it (similar to dad jokes).

 

SP Team

Evil doktor, pharma shill, vaccine chemist, Monsanto spokesperson, GMO lobbyist, chemtrail deployer and false flag organizer.