Heterosexual marriages falling apart all over America since legalization of gay marriage

In a recent study conducted by the US Census Bureau, heterosexual marriages are feeling the heat of the new gay marriage law. Tens of thousands of straight couples are feeling the sanctity of their marriages threatened, and divorce rates have skyrocketed.

“If the trend continues, we expect to see an 80 to 90 percent divorce rate among straight couples by the year 2020” said researcher Dr. Jim Gunn. “Many pastors and ministers warned us about this, warned us the sanctity of marriage would be threatened, but we just didn’t listen.”

As is the case with so many other heterosexual marriages, Mr. and Mrs. Domingo of New Mexico immediately felt the impact of the supreme court ruling.

“It had a major impact on our marriage right away” said Maria Domingo. “It’s like there was just no sanctity left, and the family as we knew it in America and in our household was weakened.”

Pastor Rob Lepine summed up the church’s view on the whole ordeal saying, “God made it very clear in the bible that marriage is between a man and a woman, and as everyone knows, the bible is the source of all truth on earth so I’m really not surprised to hear that marriages are falling apart everywhere. Luckily for me I don’t allow my wife to watch television or talk to anyone outside the church, so our sanctity is still solid.”

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