National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health becomes the NCAA (National Center for Ambiguous Adjectives)

Bethesda, MD – In an ongoing effort to be the P Diddy of the NIH, the National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health has again changed its name. First there was the Office of Alternative Medicine (OAM), which became the National Center of Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM), then more recently the National Center of Complementary and Integrative Health (NCCIH).

According to a high ranking official:

“Constantly changing our letterhead was getting expensive, so we decided to choose a more timeless title. We thought about ‘Center for Research on Impossible, Silly and Ludicrously Implausible Pseudoscience (CRISLIP)’, but that name was already taken. ‘The National Center for Disproved and Yet to be Disproved Therapies (NCDYDT)’ did not resonate well with focus groups.”

The aha moment came when a naive intern asked what words like ‘alternative’, ‘complementary,’ ‘integrative,’ actually mean. Eureka, the National Center for Ambiguous Adjectives (NCAA) was born.

“Now we can focus on our mission of diverting funding away from promising biomedical research.”