Anti-vaccine parents tear up with sadness when talking about son who got into medical school

Anti-vaccine parents tear up with sadness when talking about son who got into medical school

Bruce and Jenny Turnbull are devastated after hearing the news that their son, Matthew, secretly applied and was accepted to Harvard Medical School. Matthew last had a major fight with his anti-vaccine parents when he went behind their back and got all his recommended vaccinations when he was 18.

“This is just so sad and so disappointing” said Jenny Turnbull. “You try to do everything right as a mother: no vaccines, no doctor visits, only raw milk and food, home school, everything. When your son goes behind your back and does something this terrible, it really hurts.”

Matthew managed to get accepted to university for his undergraduate degree in neuroscience. He told his parents he was taking a double major in religious studies and alternative medicine.

“I’m surprised they believed me to be honest, but I got away with it for 4 years” explained Matthew. “I also managed to save up a lot of money throughout my undergrad degree and I got a scholarship for medical school, so I am paying my own way.”

With the news that Matthew no longer needs them for pretty much anything, the Turnbull’s are obviously very distraught.

“It’s going to be really hard to be proud of a son who sold out and will be using modern medicine to save people’s lives instead of selling miracle cures online like a true maverick.”

 

  • Ekaterina Kaverina

    not funny

    • Mike Tan

      What is not funny? I agree it’s not funny how stupid the parents are.

  • Julie Powell

    Please tell me this is a joke article?

    • Cristina

      I think this whole website is meant to be a bit tongue in cheek!

    • BossTweed599

      Welcome to TheSpudd. If you’re looking for “totally legit” articles about other things, I’d recommend TheOnion.
      TheSpudd is mostly about health and wellness, hence the name.

    • Chris

      Don’t fret, some people think the following link is a real church (hint: it’s very unsubtle satire):
      http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

      The point is to be careful about what you read on ‘teh internets.” It is all unedited, and not checked. It is just much easier to disseminate total nonsense through the “web.”

      Back in the “old days” I wrote actual snail mail letters to the editor of our local newspaper, where my full name and city of residence was listed. Some decided to “educate” me. I came home one day and found in my mailbox several copied off pages on “technocracy” (it included plans to make a canal system across the Rocky Mountains and Cascades, a bit out dated). Another day (this over a period of ten years) someone placed copied pages about a special diet in my mailbox. I also used to get real chain mail letters with postage sent to me (usually starting with “we have the same last name so we should be related… my last name is just slightly less common than “Jones”). I have seen the same things sent around on the Internet or email spam. Same stuff, different media. I ignored all of them.

      By the way, have you heard about the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide?

  • GeeGee

    Eagerly awaiting the butt-hurt anti-vax parents who will probably believe this article is real…just like everything else they read on the Internet.

  • GaMomof5

    Congratulations to Matthew!

  • Ciarrai Faerie

    sat·ire

    ˈsaˌtī(ə)r/

    noun

    the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people’s stupidity or vices

  • Del

    This would be hilarious if it weren’t real. I applaud the young man for setting off on his own. I hope he is able to bring some real help to people. Jenner, and other scientists would be proud of him.

    • 3lbisivni

      It’s not real. Look at the top of the page where it says “Science, health, satire.”

  • Wow. Satire that ridicules people who question the mainstream
    medical/pharmaceutical paradigm, and diligently reinforces vaccine
    doctrine. How dangerous and revolutionary. Lol.

    • FireDragons42

      Who says satire needs to be dangerous and revolutionary. Sometimes it is just needed to make fun of things that are dangerous and utterly stupid, such as anti-vaccers.

      • Blind belief is dangerous. Manufactured consensus masquerading as science is dangerous. The entire vaccine paradigm is a house of cards, and its foundations are shaking. Thus, the need (by some) for satire to prop it up. It’s satire to serve the masters. 😀

        • FireDragons42

          Except vaccines have continued to show their efficacy, from the early beginnings of purposely infecting people with cowpox to protect them from small pox, up to modern vaccines against things like meningitis and the flu.

          You don’t need to manufacture that consensus, because it comports with reality.

          • That is factually incorrect. The data does not support your claims.

          • FireDragons42

            So I guess that small pox was never eradicated then hmm?

          • It was never eradicated with a vaccine, correct.

          • FireDragons42

            HAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh sorry, you’re just a complete and total brain dead idiot.

        • Lori Koonce

          Have you swallowed enough of the koolaid that you now have lost any reading comprehension skills you may have had in the past?

        • Del

          It’s amazing that the anti-vexers don’t realize they have been brain-washed into following the nuts on the internet in joining into their religion. Many vegetarians, anti-vexers, political fanatics have made a religion out of their beliefs. And in a psychological transference accuse the rational people who have read and understand the overwhelming statistical studies showing the horrific results of the diseases prevented by vaccination, and the small number of people harmed by vaccinations, are accused by the anti-vaxers of having been brain-washed.