Parents worried daughter is being taught science at local Catholic High School

Parents of 15 year-old Chastity Matthews are concerned that their daughter may be receiving some of the devil’s teachings on science at what they believed was a strictly Catholic high school.

“You do what is best for your children, which includes sheltering them from the devil’s science,” explained a distraught Mrs. Matthews. “We only want the best for our little girl, and that doesn’t involve learning about things outside of the word of the Lord.”

Chastity’s parents became concerned when they found a book in her backpack which suggested the earth may be older than 6000 years.

“We were devastated. We don’t want our beautiful daughter getting corrupted by the evils of science. We are planning on selling in her into slavery as is sanctioned by Exodus 21:7, and she will fetch a far lower price if she is tainted with the devil’s science.”

Chastity told her parents that she was merely holding the textbook for a friend and not to worry, she is still science-free and pure of heart.

The Matthews are calling for an investigation from the school board and the Pope.


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