CHICAGO, IL – Self proclaimed graduates of University of Google will gather next weekend in Chicago to hold a graduation ceremony for themselves. While they are trying to secure Jenny McCarthy (the most famous graduate that the non-existent school boasts) to give the commencement speech, whether or not she will attend is still up the air. The day promises to be full of fun, laughter and non-vaccinated people rubbing elbows. There will be an all-natural, gluten-free buffet devoid of both sugar and taste, and diplomas will be printed on recycled hemp paper.
The popularity of University of Google shot up when anti-vaccine superstar Jenny McCarthy told Oprah Winfrey that she got her science education at the University of Google. I mean, who needs to learn from long-standing academic institutions? One can simply Google the information for themselves and discard websites which disagree with their point of view and trumpet the validity of those sites which agree.
“The best part about the University of Google is the tuition fee” jokes graduate Jennifer Howard, “although I have spent thousands of dollars on alternative medicine in the last few years.”
If you have used Google to confirm a conclusion you already had (especially if it involves health or vaccines) we encourage you to attend a local graduation ceremony, or at least have one yourself in your parents backyard with friends (or cats).