Illuminati to Hold Open Auditions


The most powerful and secret society is losing members, as most of the Illuminati are getting older and dying off. In an unprecedented move, the secret organization will be holding American Idol-like auditions at Wal-Marts across the country. So what exactly are they looking for? Warren Buffett explains:

“We need newer, younger Illuminati to carry on our tradition of market manipulation, de-population through vaccinations, Agenda 21 and so on. We need people who are wealthy, smart, and above all else, willing to step on the heads of the little person to further our agenda.”

While the Illuminati’s very existence has been debated for years, this is a clear indication that the secret society is alive and well, save for the aging membership.

“We need leaders. We need people who will organize a massive New World Order takeover: rounding up non-Illuminati and forcing them to live in FEMA camps and of course continue the lie that vaccines are safe and effective when really they are a form of population control and a means to increases autism,” explains Buffett.

So if you think you have what it takes to join this noble cause, check your local papers for an “Illuminati Idol” coming to a Wal-Mart near you.


Evil doktor, pharma shill, vaccine chemist, Monsanto spokesperson, GMO lobbyist, chemtrail deployer and false flag organizer.