ARLINGTON, VA – Scientists at the FBI have confirmed that anyone who has a wall full of maps, strings, photographs and newspaper clippings, will eventually follow through with an evil plot.
“We studied the apartments and homes of over 200 people who were instrumental in carrying out evil plots,” explained Dr. Scott Horvath of the FBI. “Over 95% of them had some kind of giant map with strings.”
The NSA is apparently very interested in the results of the study, as they have photographs of the inside of every American’s home in the country.
“We will be using the intelligence gathered from this study to carry out a series of pre-arrests,” confirmed an NSA agent with a very deep voice.
So if you have a giant map with strings in your home, it is best to take it down immediately or face being raided by the American Military.