In an new and explosive study published in Chiro Quarterly, pediatric chiropractic adjustments have been found to be both safe and effective.
“I think this study will quiet all the naysayers once and for all” said Billy DeMoss. “This is a peer-reviewed study showing exactly what the researchers started out to show, it doesn’t get more scientific than that.”
Critics of the paper are suggesting that it was published in a giant “echo-chamber”, meaning it was only scrutinized by the authors colleagues who also had an incentive for the results to be true.
“This is a giant heap of woocrap” said scientist and orthopedic surgeon Dr. Dave Wells. “I’m not surprised of course, but I would definitely not recommend chiropractic adjustments on the necks and backs of small children, no matter what this “study” suggests.”
Alternative health practitioners, especially chiropractors of course, are touting this as the golden standard of proof for “chiro for kids” being safe. Billy DeMoss is encouraging all parents to get their children to a chiropractor as soon as possible, perhaps even while still in the womb.
“It is never too early to start paying for a chiropractor and never too early to stock up on the various supplements and essential oils that I sell.”