New anti-vaccine dating app 'Hinder' infecting users phones with virus

Reports out of the tech sector this morning indicate that the hot new dating app for anti-vaccers, Hinder, has been infecting users phones with a dangerous virus. The developers of the app were scrambling to do damage control before the problem got any worse. But then something strange happened…

“We started contacting all of the affected users via email and telling them the issue with the app” explained developer Mike Chang. “But they all wrote us back saying it was fine. They wanted their phones to get “natural immunity” to whatever the virus was.”

The virus apparently wipes out the users entire phone, resetting it to its factory settings and stealing the users email and password. “They really should delete the app and change their passwords” said tech expert John McClure from TechCrunch. “I’ve never heard of anyone wanting a virus on their phone, it’s really strange.”

The app has been a huge hit with anti-vaccers who are trying to hook up with like minded people, plus it increases their chances of getting whatever bugs are going around at the time.

“I love the app” said longtime user Nancy Nickles, who has been using Hinder since it’s beta stage. “I have met so many cool people AND I got chicken pox from this one guy. So only 3 weeks of being horribly sick plus a little bout of pancreatitis, and now I have natural immunity for life! Well that and a few scars, but that’s the price you gotta pay to out smart Big Pharma.”

Hinder continues its climb in popularity and is currently the number 1 anti-vaccine app on the market, taking over the top spot last week from Angry Moms.

 

Evil doktor, pharma shill, vaccine chemist, Monsanto spokesperson, GMO lobbyist, chemtrail deployer and false flag organizer.