NEW YORK, NY – Anti-vaccers the world over are celebrating in the streets today as their long held belief that correlation equals causation has finally been proven.
“This is such a great day” said Mary McClelland, anti-vaccine mother. “This is one of the greatest days of my life. The other being that time some pro-vaccer was schooling me in science but then made a spelling mistake. That was a great day too.”
Scientists from Mike Adams Natural News lab released a report today confirming the discovery.
“Using high tech sounding machines and science stuff, we were able to confirm that yes, correlation does equal causation; especially when dealing with vaccines,” explained Adams.
This new discovery will give credence to the vaccine/autism connection as well as anything else conspiracy theorists can connect.
“Basically we can now say that if Event B happened after Event A, that Event A must have caused Event B. It’s a great day to be a conspiracy theorist,” said tinfoil magnate Zimfara Janus. “I can’t wait to get on social media and rub all those stupid, book-learnin’ science believers faces in it.”
A full report is expected to be released behind a paywall on the main Natural News website.
