NEW YORK, NY – One of the largest bottled water companies in the world, Dasani, has merged with homeopathic medicine company Natural Homeopathy in a massive merger.
“This will ensure Natural Homeopathic never runs out of medicine,” said CEO Dan Ullman. “As everyone knows, water is the most important and most expensive aspect of homeopathic medicine.”
While all is well with the Natural Homeopathic brass, things are not going so smoothly over at Dasani.
“We are going to try and fight this in court. We thought this was a 100 million dollar deal, we didn’t know they were going to pay us homeopathically,” said Dasani COO Dirk Graham. “Let this be a lessen to everyone who deals with alternative medicine: always read the fine print.”
Stay tuned for further developments.
