Local anti-vaccer, conspiracy theorist and family outcast Gary told reporters he is close to perfecting his annual Thanksgiving rant on vaccines and chemtrails for this years big Thanksgiving family dinner.
“The key is to lure them in with something sensible, something they can relate to like the Paris attacks,” explained Gary. “Even though those of us who are awake know it was a false flag, the sheep eat that stuff up. Once I have them hooked, I start in with all my evidence about the harms of vaccines and chemtrails. Bam. They are going to be blown away.”
However, rumor has it that Gary’s cousin, Mark, has a new girlfriend who is a surgical resident at the local hospital and may be a thorn in Gary’s side this holiday season.
“Pffft, bring it on,” said a defiant Gary. “I guarantee you I have more education and have done more research on vaccines and chemtrails than she has.”
The Spudd managed to reach cousin Mark’s new girlfriend, Dr. Natalie Howard and she had this to say about Gary:
“I will confess that yes, Gary has most likely done more research on chemtrails than I have. However, I imagine I have more knowledge and understanding of vaccinations and immunology than he does. Being how this is my first family affair with Mark, I will probably just stay out of the way and let Gary do his thing.”
We will keep you updated with any further developments.
