Local man struggling to wake up despite repeated warnings

Local man struggling to wake up despite repeated warnings

DARLING, ND – Local man Mark Sheeple has reportedly been bedridden for days, unable to wake up. Numerous people from around the world have joined in the cause, urging Sheeple to WAKE UP!!

“It blows my mind that in this day and age their are still Sheeple who are not awake to what is really going on,” said conspiracy theorist Mark McLalland. “I don’t know how many times I have to yell WAKE UP SHEEPLE! for it to sink in.”

Investigators believe Mr. Sheeple is suffering from a severe form of narcolepsy and is unable to wake up for more than a few minutes at at time to eat and shower.

We attempted to interview Mr. Sheeple but he was unable to wake up for the interview.

Family and friends of Sheeple are surprised and grateful for the amount of support he is getting from social media and internet commenters.

“It warms my heart to go online and see so many people asking for Mark to wake up and get better,” said his sister, Mary Shill. “Though they aren’t as nice to me as they are to him,” she laughed.