LOS ANGELES, CA – Homeopathic nosodes, which are marketed as an alternative to vaccines, appear to show promise according to a new report released in The Homeopathic Journal of Homeopathy for Homeopaths.
“The study shows a lot of promise,” said author Dan Ullman. “We were able to show that if we promise parents the nosodes are safe and effective they will believe us and buy them. This is very promising for our bottom line.”
Many scientists and real doctors are against the use of homeopathy as a replacement for vaccines, since they don’t work.
“Homeopathy in lieu of vaccines is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard,” said Big Pharma lacky Paul Proffit. “How eating some sugar pills with water dripped over them is supposed to protect children from diphtheria and tetanus is beyond me.”
No governing health body in the world recommends homeopathy for protecting children from diseases, but believers of magic water dismiss these claims as part of a giant global conspiracy.
“You believe PhD’s and MD’s when it comes to medicine? I feel sorry for you,” said Paul Therro, naturopath and science denier. “Now, do your research and come buy a bunch of stuff from my store.”