In what many hope will start the healing in one of the most painful chapters in American history, tens of thousands of pediatricians and scientists will begin reporting to jail next week for their role in perpetrating the vaccine hoax on the American public. For centuries (before the hoax was revealed) vaccines had been perceived as perhaps the greatest achievement in modern medicine. Yet several brave, lone individuals were willing to think for themselves and do their own research. While they initially faced scorn for blaming vaccines for conditions ranging from autism to SIDs, their suspicions were confirmed by a series of high-level whistleblowers who said they could not longer live with the guilt of poisoning children to enrich themselves.
The conspiracy began to unravel in 2014 when a CDC scientist hinted that suppressed studies indicated a higher risk of autism in African-American boys who had received the MMR vaccine. Within months, dozens of other scientists stepped forward to reveal that the entire edifice of the nation’s vaccine program had been built on lies and deceptions.
“Every single study attesting to either the efficacy or safety of vaccines was found to be fraudulent,” said the head of the CDC, Dr. Sherri Fivenickel. “This encompassed over 200,000 studies, spanning 75 years, and involving over 60,000 scientists and doctors, all of who will be serving a minimum of 5 years in jail.”
Several new penal facilities have been constructed to house the new inmates.
The former head of the American Academy of Pediatrics told The Spudd that he while he “regretted” his role in the vaccine hoax, the lure of money was too great. “Listen, when you are vaccinating maybe 50 kids per day and you can earn $2-3 dollars per vaccine, it is not hard to see how that money adds up pretty quickly. I am naturally ashamed of the role I and tens of thousands of other people played in this decades-long coverup, but it just shows how anyone can be corrupted by that kind of money.”
“There are some heroes here,” said Dr. Fivenickel. “Even before the whistleblowers stepped forward, there were a few brave souls like myself and President Wakefield who were willing to be free-thinkers. The real winners here are the American children, of course. Since vaccinations have stopped, autism, SIDs, depression, MS, cancer, ALS, and many other diseases have vanished as we said they would.”
