Big Pharma announces huge reduction in vaccine costs for Black Friday

Big Pharma announces huge reduction in vaccine costs for Black Friday

NEW HAVEN, CT – Big Pharma is apparently embracing the Thanksgiving spirit and slashing the costs associated with vaccinations for 24 hours today, ‘Black Friday’. “The usual costs associated with vaccines are autism, chronic diseases, getting the very disease you are getting the vaccine for, etc” explained Big Pharma’s Dr. David Orac. “But for Black […]

Doctor gets taste of his own medicine, now cancer free

Doctor gets taste of his own medicine, now cancer free

Local oncologist Dr. Wayne Harris recently finished his final round of chemotherapy and doctors have told him he is officially cancer free. “It’s a great feeling, to be told you are cancer free is a such a wonderful thing” explained Harris. “I’ve been fortunate enough to tell many people that news over the course of […]

Shilly Awards bring few surprises, streaker

Shilly Awards bring few surprises, streaker

LOS ANGELES, CA – The 1st annual Pharma Shill Awards, or “Shillys”, took place last night in Los Angeles. Aside from a streaking Andrew Wakefield, the show went off without a hitch with many of the favorites taking home awards. See the full list of winners below:

Merck to hire more female scientists to save money

Merck to hire more female scientists to save money

As is the case with most professions, females make between 10 and 30 percent less than their male counterparts for doing the same job. After crunching some numbers, pharmaceutical giant Merck saw a huge opportunity. “We can hire women scientists with the exact same credentials as men, but pay them much less” said Merck CFO […]