NEW YORK, NY – Brian Farreli, 31, is a single man trying to make a living in New York City and has become bored with his mundane routine. He is currently searching the internet far and wide to find a conspiracy theory he can really sink his teeth into.
“Everyday of my life is the same: wake up, go to my boring office job, come home, watch tv, go to bed. Rinse and repeat. I really need a good conspiracy theory and cause to get behind” explained Farreli.
So far, Farreli has narrowed his options down to chemtrails, GMOs and vaccines cause autism. Any of those would be a great choice.
“There is plenty of pseudoscience and websites dedicated to all three of those conspiracies, so I think it’s really a win-win at this point, no matter which one I choose,” said Farreli.
He also spent a good deal of time on Facebook, visiting various pages of all three groups to try and get a feel for what they stand for. Currently, the anti-GMO crowd is pushing hard to get Farreli to join their camp.
“They are offering me all kinds of perks and impressive sounding education. I didn’t even know I could just become a ‘holistic nutritionist’ without any training at all.”
At press time, Farelli had still not officially made up his mind.
