Baby starts talking just hours after getting MMR vaccine

science, health, satire, vaccines.

HOUSTON, TX – 12 month old Taylor Anderson shocked her parents when she said her first word, “mommy”, just hours after getting her MMR vaccine.

“She had been trying to speak for awhile now, mostly just ooo’s and ahhh’s” said her mother, Catherine. “But within a few hours of getting home from the doctors office, she said “mommy”, “daddy” and a couple other words too.”

Taylor is the first child which Dr. Andrew Vakefield is hoping to add to his 12 person case series study.

“I am hoping to enroll 11 other children in the study who have also recently had the MMR vaccine, then do some invasive tests without ethics approval,” explained Vakefield. “I think this research could really shed some light on the MMR vaccine and I foresee no possible problems.”

Anti-talkers believe that aluminum in the MMR vaccine is causing children to prematurely begin speaking (even though it is not in the vaccine).

“It’s not natural for kids to start speaking just because a toxic vaccine was injected into their bloodstream,” said Joe Gooding, anti-talker. “I’ve done my research.”

Vakefield’s research is expected to be wrapped up by the end of the year and then retracted within the next two.

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